Friday, July 29, 2011

(Sometimes I’m convinced that when I type things how they make sense to me, they don’t stand a chance of making sense to anyone else. Oh well…)

Every now and then, I have these “revelations” about what getting married means. They’re usually at very random times. Like the other day I was using the toaster oven at my grandparent’s house and I noticed all the crumbs at the bottom and I thought to myself, “One day, I’ll own my own toaster oven, and I’ll have to clean the crumbs out of the bottom.” Weird right?

It’s kind of funny the things I think of. Greg probably thinks I’m a weirdo when I tell him about them. But holy cow! Being married means taking on a lot of responsibility (*Disclaimer*: I knew this before I made the decision to get married. I wasn’t just like, “Ooooh, being married sounds fun!” Give me some credit here people). Still, in spite of already knowing that marriage means really growing up, it still surprises me in some ways.

That nasty ring around the toilet? Can’t for someone else to clean it! Oh no, we’re out of toilet paper? Can’t wait for someone else to buy it! My car breaks down? Can’t wait for my parents to pay to get it fixed! I want our home to be decorated? Can’t wait for someone else to do it! That pile of dishes? Can’t wait for someone else to put them away! (Obviously Greg will help with the cleaning. He’s not that much of a chauvinist).

I feel like I’ve always done a pretty good job of being clean and taking care of myself. And I think cleaning with be a million times better when you don’t have to clean up stupid roommate’s messes. But being married will take it to a whole new level (does anyone else besides me use the phrase “a whole nother?” It definitely doesn’t type out very well). Greg and I will be responsible for a home, all of the bills (no more splitting with roommates), cleaning… and one day we’ll be responsible for actual little humans!

This marriage thing most certainly isn’t frivolous fun. (It is fun – just not frivolous fun  )

Greg and I get married in approximately 21 days 20 hours 50 minutes (not that I have a countdown on my homepage). It’s fun to think about living with my best friend, coming home to him, seeing him when I wake up in the morning, calling him my husband, participating in married hand-holding (yes, I did have a church leader who called it that- awkward), not having a curfew, etc. But I’m really glad that I realize all the effort that it will take. I think people who don’t realize how much responsibility they’re taking on with a marriage are in for a rude awakening. Obviously I’ve never been married so I can’t fully understand what it will be like. But I’d like to think I’m a very practical and realistic person.

It’s just surprising to me how there are certain things I’ve always known have to change when I get married. For instance, we can’t let anyone else make our decisions for us. We need to remove that desire to always to what our parents want and we need to focus on what making our own decisions. It just shocks me sometimes how close I am to being married – It’s always been a matter of “when I’m married, I’ll….” But soon I’ll be married and those things won’t just be decisions anymore. They’ll need to be actions.

Anyways, Greg is great. I was just joking when I called him a chauvinist.

PS Two marriage posts in a row!? I apologize
PPS Jessica Callahan, congrats on taking the MCAT!

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Twoo Wuv

Something that’s been on my mind a lot lately…


And no, not in terms of “Oh my gosh, I’m getting married soon, this is so exciting, yay wedding!” More like “How does the world view marriage?” “Why is it important to me?” “Why do some people see it differently?”

I think it’s fair to say that most people don’t really value marriage. Maybe they want to be married *one day*, maybe they never want to get married. And I can hardly blame them! Marriages have been on a fast decline. How many people actually get married and stay married? And how many of the people who do stay married are happy?

Today one of my coworkers asked “What’s the rush?” in response to the classic stories of “my friend so-and-so only dated his wife for 3 weeks before they got engaged and then they were engaged for 2 months and blah blah blah.” It made me think – why are people in a rush to get married? Or, rather, why do people perceive most Mormon’s and being in a rush to get married?

I came to the realization that it is due to our desire to get married. I think that is a much more accurate description than saying we’re “in a rush.” We equate “family” and “happiness” and “love” and “home” with marriage. Naturally it’s something we value and desire. We know that true happiness comes in a loving home.

Oh, but aren’t we just so unrealistic to think that marriage is happy? Isn’t it so stupid of us to think that marriage is more about the hard work you put in after you say “I do”/ “Yes” than it is about knowing each other for years beforehand? Why should we have to work in a marriage? Aren’t we so naïve for wanting to work for a marriage? Shouldn’t we just take more time to look for the person who everything will be perfect with? Aren’t we so dumb for not dating for years and years and years before we get married so we can really be sure that we can get along with this person?

Whoah whoah whoah… let’s talk about naïve for a second. How naïve is it to think that being with someone won’t take work? How naïve is it to think that, with time, you will find someone who is *perfect* for you? How ridiculous is it to think that a marriage isn’t successful or isn’t worth it if you have disagreements?

I’m sure most of my friends were SHOCKED when they found out I was engaged. Greg and I met in January and were engaged at the end of March. Trust me; I never thought that would be me. I totally judged people who got engaged quick. But guess what? I am 100% sure of my decision. I know I still have a lot to learn about Greg – but people who have been married for years are still learning things about each other all the time. I know marriage will take work – but not matter how long we dated, marriage will still take work.

I know that Greg can drive me crazier than anyone else on this planet. But I also know that when I’ve had a bad day, when I’m feeling insecure, inadequate, hurt, scared or even when I’m super happy, Greg will be right there to share in that with me. I know marriages can become stale, relationships can become static. But the thought that I will always be able to turn to him when I need someone, or that I will be able to be there for him when he needs me makes it all worth it.

Years down the road, we’ll have kids and will be super busy and we’ll spend more time with our kids or at work than we will with each other. Some people might never even see us show affection to one another. But I know that at the end of the day, he’ll always be there for me. I’ll be able to lay down in bed and tell him what’s on my mind. And that’s totally worth it. No matter how much our relationship changes from how it is now, no matter how much the romance dies, he will always be my best friend and my confidante. He will always be there to dry the tears and heal a hurting heart.

Plus he’s super hot. Who wouldn't want to marry him?!

Monday, July 18, 2011

I'm not a very good blogger.

Let's be real- my life right now revolves around work, greg, and wedding planning. No one wants to hear me talk about accounting anymore than I want to talk about it. (Side note - whenever the people I work with go out to lunch together, I think I'm the only person who would rather talk about personal life things than work/accounting. And for the record, I don't think accounting jokes are funny, nor do I think it's funny to say things like "Oh, I guess that's the accountant in us," or "we're such typical auditors!" I am not a freak) The last thing anyone wants to read is some mushy post about how perfect Greg is . And nobody but me really cares that much about my wedding choices.


Survey for people who have nothing better to talk about on their blogs:

1. What feature of the opposite sex do you notice first?

I don't really know... probably mostly height and face.

2. Do you talk to yourself?

I don't think so... maybe I just don't realize that I do. I do sing in the car, and sometimes when I'm rehearsing what I am planning on saying to someone/what I wish I would have said to someone, I find myself saying it out loud.

3. What is your current relationship status?

Engaged... its kinda freaking me out that I get married in a month. Not freaking out like a "Aaaah, what am I doing?!" but like a "Holy crap, will everything get done in time??"

4. Do you have a garden?

No... I foresee myself trying it at some point in the future, but we'll see how long that lasts

5. What is your favorite licorice flavor?

Licorice is gross

Friday, July 8, 2011

Sometimes I feel guilty…

Greg is graduating in April 2012. If I finish my master’s degree at BYU, I will graduate in April 2013. My plan has always been to get my MAcc (Master of Accountancy), at least ever since I started at BYU. But what does that mean for Greg? It means he has to bum around Provo for a year, meaning more limited choices for his options in starting his career.

Why is it so important for me to get my MAcc? Your options are so much more open if you get a master’s degree. If you have a bachelor’s degree, you’re pretty much stuck in a cubicle making journal entries, doing the same thing day after day, week after week, month after month, capping at an average salary. You can go far, but it’s a lot harder. You will have a much harder time getting into the jobs that will give you the experience necessary to get into even better jobs.

Let me break it down for you – most people would say the best thing you can do for your accounting career is to work for the Big 4 for a couple of years. Who are the big four? Ernst & Young, Deloitte, KPMG, and PWC. These are accounting firms who audit other businesses. They’re a super huge deal. You get so much experience, and once you have one of them on your resume, you’re set for life. Well, the Big 4 only want to hire you if you’re CPA eligible because they want you to get a CPA. Each state has different rules for the CPA exam, but most states, while they don’t exactly require a MAcc, they do require a high number of upper level business and accounting classes that are kind of hard to reach without a MAcc.

So, if I don’t do that MAcc, I can get some boring accounting job and maybe pursue a MAcc later in life. But that means living somewhere else long enough to establish residency, and taking the GMAT, which I don’t have to worry about if I do the MAcc at BYU. Or, yeah, I could probably get those required classes for the CPA without doing the extra year for the MAcc (if I worked my butt off and took 18 credits winter semester)… but, not gonna lie, some of the MAcc classes really interest me! They have classes on investing, real estate, financial planning – stuff that I feel like I can really use to benefit my future family.

So what is my plan? Ideally, I want to work for the Big 4 because they will pay for me to get my CPA (and that’s an expensive test to take – they’ll even pay for my test prep!). Then I will have Big 4 experience and a CPA certification on my resume – I can walk away from work for awhile, have a family, and then when my kids are older, I can walk back into the business world and say “Hey, I’m kind of a big deal, I have Big 4 experience and a CPA and you will hire me and pay me well and let me work a flexible schedule so I still have time with my husband and children.” And they will say “Oh my gosh, yes please, you are so awesome, we would love to have you, take as much time off as you need, whenever you need it, and here, take a million dollars per year!” (I wish). No, but really – I’d have some sweet skills to offer, and they’d be sooo much more willing to let me work a flexible than if I didn’t have such a strong background.

But is it really fair for me to ask Greg to put his career on hold so I can get mine in full swing? Especially if we’re planning on him supporting us once we start having children? Especially since he wants to pursue an MBA and needs strong business experience to take that route?

Warning: this will sound extremely judgmental. Probably cuz it is: I have a few female friends/friends of friends/acquaintances/random people from my home town who I creepily blog stalk who are just following their husbands wherever they need to go. “Oh, you want to move to Europe. Ok!” “I’m not gonna be able to graduate cuz you are starting a job across the country? Ok!” For some of them, it’s because they have strong career opportunities no matter where they go (power women, with strong degrees, like nursing or business! You go girls!). For others, it’s because they have zero opportunities no matter where they go. Maybe I should be more like those girls, and just give up this idea of being a power working woman. Maybe that’s what would be best for our family?

Lots to think about …

Thursday, July 7, 2011

My Driving Pet Peeves
1. Tailgaters
2. People who try to pass me on the right when I’m already going 5 over the speed limit- I will speed up and cut you off so that you can’t pass me
3. People who change lanes during bumper to bumper traffic just because the lane next to them inched forward slightly faster than their own
4. When you’re driving on the freeway and you come up on someone going slower than you, so you prepare to pass them on the left. But the left lane is kind of full right now, so you wait it out. Then someone else comes behind you, and now two of you are stuck behind the slow car. So you put your blinker on to merge over when you see an opening in the left lane, and the jerk behind you steals the opening before you ever get a chance!!
5. When everyone knows that the lane ahead is ending, but people still wait until the last possible second to get over. In fact, they don’t ever merge over – they just drive in the ending lane until it fades in the next lane. Then everyone behind them has to watch out for them so the car doesn’t just swipe into them.

And now for another episode of this survey (courtesy of google):
1. What is your favorite yogurt flavor?
Not a huge yogurt fan. The consistency kind of makes me gag after a few bites (same with applesauce and sometimes mashed potatoes). But the kind I will usually start to eat is strawberry or vanilla. Putting granola in it makes it much more bearable.

2. Ankle or knee socks? White socks or colored??
White ankle socks. Greg wears knee socks cuz he doesn’t like ankle socks and there’s this super funny picture in our engagements where you can totally see his socks cuz his pants are hiked up a little bit. Here it is! Enjoy!

My little old man!

3. How is the weather right now?
Cloudy and a little rainy, in the 80’s. I don’t mind it when it’s cloudy sometimes, as long as it stays warm and doesn’t last for too long!

4. Are you a fast typer?
Decently. Last I checked I was around 70 wpm, w/ 0 errors! So yeah, I’m kind of a big deal!

5. Red or White Wine?
Dr. Pepper